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One particular Christmas season a long time ago, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip but there were problems everywhere. Four of his elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule...

All drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name is Tylenol and it's generic name is Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen. So now the FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. ...

At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 9-year-old baseball players aside and asked, 'Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?' The little boy nodded in the affirmative. 'Do you understand that what matters is whether we win or lose together as a team?' The little boy n...

Two Mexicans are riding a bicycle on a road about 15 miles outside of Phoenix, Arizona. One of the bike's tires goes flat and they start hitching a lift back into town. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the Mexicans ask him for a ride. He tells them they can ride in the trailer if t...

Years ago an old man was fishing off the Brazos River in South Texas when he ran out of worms. Unable to find anything else to use as bait, he started to pack his things. Suddenly he spied a water moccasin snake, sometimes knowns as a cottonmouth snake, with a frog in it's mouth. Well, he knew the f...

In order to get Bill Gates to save your soul and keep rat poop from getting on your toothbrush, I'm going to foward this to all my BFF around the world.









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This was episode on the Honeymooners.

Quite funny.






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Little Johnny's neighbor, Mr. Smith, finds Johnny digging a big hole in his yard. So he asks, "Johnny why are digging such a big hole in my yard?" "It's for my goldfish that died." Johnny replied. "Well, that's a bit big of a hole for a little goldfish" said Mr. Smith. ...

Having already downed a few power drinks, a hot young woman turns around and faces the middle aged man next to her, looks him straight in the eye and says, "Listen here good looking, I screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, stan...

This must be Eric Cartman off a recent episode of South Park.

Marketing Explained You are at a party and you see a very pretty girl. You approach her and tell her: "I am very good in bed". That is Direct Marketing. You are at a party with a group of friends and you see a very pretty girl. One of your friends approaches her and tells her: "That g...

Frog walks in a bar Bob walks into the bar and sees a gorgeous blonde sitting on a bar stool all alone. So he sits down next to her and pulls a small box from his pocket. He opens it and there's a frog inside. The blonde says, "He's cute, but does he do tricks?" Bob says, "Yea, he ple...

Anthony wrote:I haven't seen one of those amphibi-cars in years...

I saw that same '67 Amphicar in April 2009 at a Virginia Beach car show. I remembered the tag 'I swim".
Wonder how he got it across the Chesapeak Bay?


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Gorilla Experiment Back in the mid-50s scientists were conducting behavior studies on gorillas. In a large pen six unrelated male gorillas from different zoos were put in at the same time. At feeding time a large bunch of bananas was placed at one end of the pen. As the gorillas grabbed the food, a ...

Sweet.






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Question to Daddy A sweet little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's sex?" So, her father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse, sperm and eggs etc. He tells her a...

Doctor Funeral A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital he worked for most of his life... A huge heart, covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service. As all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe, following the eulogy, the heart ...

A man in the Safeway Store in Texas tries to buy half a head of lettuce. The very young produce assistant tells him that they sell only whole heads of lettuce The man persists and asks to see the manager. The boy says he'll ask his manager about it. Walking into the back room, the boy said to his ma...

I'll send it as soon as I can remember.
Ooo, look a butterfly!



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